The Financial Infidelity Behind Divorces
How undisclosed spending and debt leads to divorce
Ric Edelman: It's Wednesday, July 17th. On today's show, the financial infidelity behind divorces. You've heard so many times that money is a leading cause of divorce. I'm going to share with you the latest survey data, because if you value your spouse and you want to stay married, this information can really go far to helping you succeed. And if you're doing any of the things that I'm about to describe, well, then I'm about to give you a pretty good idea of why you may well be able to expect divorce to be in your future.
In a recent survey of people who have divorced, 33%, one out of three, said that credit card debt and financial infidelity were critical factors. You know what credit card debt is. I want to make sure you know what financial infidelity is. That's lying and cheating on your spouse with money. Spending money without telling them. Hiding purchases. 70% who cited credit card debt as a reason for their divorce said they walked out on their spouse because their spouse was amassing debt secretly. Or they were, and it was their spouse who walked out on them. 80% admitted that hiding spending played a role in their separation. And in the "rock and a hard places” category, sometimes it wasn't secret spending that caused the debt, it was open spending. 57% said a big factor in their divorce were disagreements about big purchases. So, if you have to decide which is more important, that purchase you want to make, or keeping your spouse happy.
Now, often this has nothing to do with the money. If the purchase is not a problem financially, then it becomes an issue for other reasons. How much time is involved? How much work is involved? Do you have simply unrelated areas of interest? Is this really a matter of control, and the purchase is a smokescreen? That's a whole other thing. Or is it really a financial issue? One of you is a spendthrift, spending money with abandon in a desperate hope that spending money will lead to happiness. Or one of you is a hoarder, sucking away money, refusing to spend a nickel, and always being worried about money. Lots of issues here, too.
From my experience, I have found that money, or what you do with it, really isn't the problem. Money habits are the symptom, not the cause. And this is why, if one of you isn't happy, and money seems to be the focus of the conversation, then going to a marriage counselor and a financial advisor is probably a good idea. Spending money on professional help just might be the best thing that you could ever spend your money on, unless you'd rather spend it on a couple of divorce attorneys.
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Ric Edelman: On tomorrow's show, wait till you hear about this latest scam. Truly scary.
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